Why is it that when some folks are asked to say something at a special occasion, their first question is, "Do I have to write a speech?" This is accompanied by squinching up their eyes, raising their eyebrows in dismay, and maybe wrinkling their nose as if at a malodorous smell. The  question itself is often asked in a querulous tone, the underlying meaning of which is "Please tell me I don't have to write a speech. I really don't want to write a speech. Can't I just say a few words off the top of my head?"