If you're like me, every year at this time you make a few New Year's Resolutions that you have every intention  of keeping. However, also if you're like me, there are a few Resolutions that you've been carrying forward from year to year for so long that they've grown long white beards and wrinkles, but they're still turning up at the top of your list
every year like clockwork.  One is something about your weight.  Others are about getting organized, making more money, changing your lifestyle, learning to play the piano or finally getting to see the Great Wall of China.  They're like old friends that you've grown fond of and expect to see every year at this time. 

READ MORE

When it's important that you say it right, what can you do to prepare, so you won't say it wrong?  How can you ensure that the next words that come out of your mouth will be the right ones?           
 
       At this time of the year, there are lots of opportunities to meet new people at networking events or holiday parties.  Whether we have only 30 seconds to attract attention or an hour seated next to someone at a dinner table, we want to present ourselves as someone worth getting to know better.  Here are four helpful techniques to approach every new encounter with confidence and sincerity and make our interactions, brief or lengthy, memorable and worth repeating.

READ MORE 

When you get up to give a speech, what reaction do you hope to get from the audience? What will be your grade on your own inner report card? 

Have you ever split yourself in two while talking in front of the room? One half of your brain is busy thinking, "This is the information you came for. This is the message you want to hear. Listen up, because this is really interesting stuff and you'll gain terrific benefits from it," while the other half is playing saboteur going, "Uh-oh, did I leave anything out? Are they listening? They look bored. They're not paying attention. I feel faint. My mouth is dry. My hands are shaking. They think I'm making a fool of myself. Why did I think I could do this? I'm no good. I'm a failure! Aaarrrrghgghg!"

READ MORE

You're an expert in your field who's been asked to join a panel on the latest techniques for achieving specific goals. You've done your research and chosen some of the most recent, cutting-edge practices that you use with your own clients. You've prepared carefully, your bullet points are all in a row, and you've even planned ahead for any objections to your conclusions. All systems are go. 

      You're the next to last speaker, so you're listening carefully to what the other panelists have to say. To your horror, one of the speakers ahead of you has chosen a similar point of view, even used some of the same examples, and said almost exactly what you were going to say! What are you going to do?

READ MORE

When you hear a new speaker, someone you've never heard before, what is it about the way he presents that makes you feel he's someone you're going to like?  

       You respond immediately to what he has to say, you like the way he says it, and you settle in comfortably to absorb the gift he's giving you.

       But sometimes you don't feel that way.  Sometimes you can't concentrate on what's being said, your attention wanders, you squirm in your chair, look at your watch, and start thinking about what you'll have for lunch. What is it that turns you off? Are you just not in the mood to listen?  Or is there something the speaker is actually doing that makes it difficult or impossible for you to keep your attention focused on receiving his message?

READ MORE

      When you're getting ready to give a speech, do you indulge in self-talk like, "Will I say it right? Will I forget something important? Will I make a mistake? Will they get bored and stop listening? Will they think I'm a terrible speaker?" Along with these questions come those irritating and hard to control pre-speech nerves: the butterflies in your stomach, nausea, the shivers and shakes, pounding heartbeats, can't catch your breath, feel a bit lightheaded, and trouble focusing on what you want to say. There are probably others unique to you that you're quite sure no one else experiences.

      The good news is you're not alone. Everyone, including me, experiences a bit of pre-speech anxiety. It's totally normal. It's also absolutely true for most people that pre-speech nerves usually go away once we're actually talking in front of the group. It's the anticipatory anxiety for days (and nights) ahead of time that gives us nightmares. 

      Here are some techniques to help you neutralize your extraordinary pre-speech anxiety.

READ MORE